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Published Nov 19, 2018

#002: What Makes a Relationship Able to go the Distance? with Dr. Alexandra Solomon

Dr. Alexandra Solomon, a clinical psychologist, delves into the essence of sustainable relationships, offering tools for intentional connection, emotional awareness, and deeper intimacy drawn from her Marriage 101 course and professional expertise.
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  • Choosing Connection

    Communication is key in fostering connection and understanding in relationships. emphasizes the importance of choosing connection over reaction, a concept she explores in her book. She explains that in moments of conflict, it's crucial to pause and choose a response that fosters vulnerability and connection rather than disconnection 1. adds that starting conversations with openness can transform relationships, as it allows partners to share their truths without preconceived outcomes 2.

    The path back to connection... always involves leaning in with something that feels tender, scary, risky.

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    This approach encourages partners to engage in meaningful dialogue, paving the way for deeper understanding and intimacy.

       

    Thriving Relationships

    Thriving relationships require intentional practices and habits. and discuss the importance of creating rituals that nurture connection, such as scheduling time for intimacy. This intentionality, they argue, can be romantic and helps maintain a vibrant relationship amidst busy lives 3. highlights the role of self-awareness in building thriving relationships, noting that understanding oneself is crucial for connecting with others 4.

    We declare that time in that space for us... it becomes part of the habits and rituals that nurture the couple and their connection.

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    These practices help couples sustain their bond and keep the relationship dynamic and fulfilling.

       

    Marriage 101

    Insights from the popular Marriage 101 course at Northwestern University offer valuable lessons on relationship dynamics. shares that the course, which attracts a diverse group of students, emphasizes systemic thinking in relationships. This approach encourages students to consider how individual histories and belief systems interact to shape relationship dynamics 5. The course's popularity underscores the universal desire to understand and improve romantic relationships.

    It's a course where we are learning to become systemic thinkers... how we're always talking about, like, it's my stuff plus your stuff that creates our stuff.

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    By fostering this mindset, the course equips students with the tools to navigate complex relationship landscapes.

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